Tips for Moms Going Back to School

The question I get asked the most is, “Do you have advice or tips for other moms going back to school?” For those of you that may not know, in addition to being a wife, a mother of a 4-year-old and 2-year-old, and working full-time, I am currently pursuing my doctorate degree. To date, I am about halfway through my program. I also manage this blog part-time. As I am sure you can see, I have a lot on my plate, but I make it work. I am finding success in each of these areas of my life.

Is it easy? No!

Has it all been worth it? YES!

Are you a mom going back to college? Are you a mom completing your G.E.D.? Or, are you a mom going after a professional degree? No matter what type of degree or program you may be entering, these tips for moms going back to school can be applied to your journey. Please see my tips below:

Tip 1 – Solidify Your Support System

I am not afraid to ask for help. Other moms going back to school should get comfortable with the idea of asking for help too. Before applying to my doctoral program, I had transparent conversations with the people who I consider a part of my family’s village. I spoke to my mother, mother-in-law, aunts, and babysitters to let them know that I was planning to pursue my doctorate. During those conversations, they all told me how proud they were of me and asked how they could help. This was when I let them know that I may need their assistance in watching our children when I need to study or have to work on a project. They all agreed to assist me. You would be surprised how many people want to see you succeed and want to aid in your success.

In addition to communicating with my village, my husband and I also had to get on the same page. Me entering school meant that a lot of the household responsibilities would now fall on him. My husband and I devised a plan to ensure that I had enough time to get my work done. We initially agreed that he would be the lead parent three nights out of the week while I spent time in our office doing school work. We have since altered the plan to fit where I am now. This is an ongoing conversation as I continue to make my way through my program.

As a mom going back to school, having these conversations and making sure care for my children has been covered has made it so much easier to focus on my school work.

Tip 2 – Get Organized

This boat could not float if I was disorganized. I stay on top of my school work, office work, and all of the things I need to do for my children. I utilize digital calendars and physical planners to help me stay on task. I have several assignments for school due weekly, in addition to my work duties and responsibilities at home. To keep all of the balls in the air, I have to remain organized.

Prior to entering school, I was a procrastinator. There is no room for that habit now. If I procrastinate, I may miss a deadline or an important event. I work really hard to get things done early, or as they are assigned to ensure that I do not fall behind.

Tip 3 – Hone Your Time Management Skills

Schoolwork takes up a lot of my time. Office work and blogging takes up a lot of my time. Being a wife and mother also takes up a lot of my time. All of these areas of my life are competing priorities that I have to make time for. One way that I do this is by compartmentalizing. For example, when I am at work, I am at work. I don’t do the “work” associated with the other priorities. I concentrate on being the best I can be at my job.

In the same vein, when I am home with my children, I do not do office work. I am tuned in to them and their needs. I am listening to their stories, playing games, and genuinely connecting with them. Once my children go to sleep (which is around 7:30 p.m.), I use the rest of the evening to work on my blog, complete my schoolwork, or connect with my husband. No matter which one of those I do, I am all in. I give it my full, uninterrupted attention. Check out this article that details more ways to hone your time management skills.

Tip 4 – Make Time for Family

There was one point while I was on this journey to academia that I found that I was spending most of the time when I was not at work, doing school work. I found that I was feeling burned out from overextending myself during the week and that all I wanted to do on the weekend was sleep. This was not fair to my husband and children. They were getting the short end of the stick, and I knew that I needed to make some changes.

One change that I made was committing Saturday to my family. PERIOD. It’s non-negotiable. My babies will only be babies for a short time. I don’t use Saturdays for schoolwork or for my job. I try to be intentional with my time with them. I plan a family activity for us to ensure that we are getting to spend quality time with one another during this crazy period in our lives. Sometimes it is as simple as a day at the park or even a movie night in the house. During that time, I don’t do anything other than connect with them.

Tip 5 – Prioritize Self-care

I’ve written an entire post dedicated to self-care (check it out when you have a chance). Self-care is always vital, but it became even more critical for me once I added full-time student to my plate. School can be stressful. School stress, coupled with all of the other stressors that are a part of my everyday life, was beginning to take a toll on my mental health. One way that I combat that is practicing self-care. I try to practice at least one form of self-care daily. I have to make sure that I make my mental health a priority during this challenging (but temporary) period.

Tip 6 – Remember Your “Why”

This might be the most important tip for moms going back to school. There comes a point in everyone’s journey as a student when they hit a wall. Things eventually get hard, and you may wonder why you even began this process. This is the point when you really need to focus on your “why.”

I decided to pursue a doctorate degree to remove the salary “glass-ceiling” in my field. I decided to do everything I can to maximize my earning potential. Although historically, there are several justifications used to limit women and people of color, I won’t be limited by my qualifications. Having this degree will put me in a position to create the best life for my family as well as provide them with the best opportunities. Also, I am setting an example for my children. My daughter knows that I am studying to be a doctor. She is watching me, and because of that, I have to finish. I want her to know that she can do anything she puts her mind to because she has seen her mommy do it. I preach and teach excellence to my family, and I start by setting the example.

When things get tough, I remind myself of my “why.” It reinvigorates and helps me to continue to push towards my goal. It helps me to see the finish line in what some times can be a very dark tunnel.

These are my tips for moms going back to school. Do you have any? Let me know in the comments.